Poetic librarian

Did it have to end

I really didn’t ever believe it would

But he hasn’t called

Even though I expected him to

I’ve done everything in my power to delete him

But he still remains.

I still have imaginary conversations with him

and listen to his imaginary responses.

I suppose I could just call him

But that would only inflame old wounds

rather than heal.

Yet a part of me doesn’t completely believe

it’s over

not forever anyhow

And so I wait

patiently.

My life is a constant balancing act

a seesaw

between positive and negative

yin and yang

a constant striving

and always fleeting

it is a shifting

of energy

and mood

calm

anxious

Being caught off guard

being well prepared

exhausted

invigorated

Yet I’ll never stop seeking

a balance

between peace and progress

toward my hopes, goals, ambitions

my inspiration.

I don’t like it when you’re not honest me. It is obvious that you don’t want to spend time with me, but I can’t figure out why. I realize there isn’t a nice way to say that we don’t have anything in common so I don’t see a need to continue the friendship, but sometimes the truth needs to be said. It would certainly save a lot of time second guessing what was said or left unsaid last spring.  But then again, maybe some things are better left unsaid.  It is always better to say nothing, if you don’t have something nice to say at all.

In November

Drops swiftly pelting the rooftops

As they cascade through the drains

A chill is in the air

As a light breeze brushes the foliage

changing colors

even while the grass blooms

Just a typical fall

in California.

I can finally say

That I look forward to Fridays

I don’t have to

go anywhere

Or face traffic from here to there.

I can swim

I can walk

I can dance

I can sing

Or choose to do absolutely nothing

A well earned day of R and R

When I choose not to drive my car

I can read a book

Or write a poem

Or phone a friend

I haven’t see in so long.

So here’s to Fridays spent at home

And now I’ve reached the end of this poem.

I am a free bird

Soaring higher and higher

Above

the clouds.

I can see the ground

Below.

Everything looks so tiny.

Like ants,

The world seems so small,

Problems diminished.

I can tackle any challenge

From here.

Yet I know,

I will  land,

On solid ground,

So that I may

conserve my energy,

As the path of my journey

unfolds.

There are not enough words

to say what you mean to me

How often

do I ask you for advice

Yet you expect only love in return

Doing the dishes and errands

seems a small price to pay

for the support and love I receive

from you and Dad.

I know that we may not always agree

But that is part of growing up

There are a lot of uncertainties in life

as the next chapter of my life unfolds

Yet I know that I will always have your love

Because you are my Mom.

 

Happy Mother’s Day

February 2017
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